Oldfag Dysphoria: Difference between revisions

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<blockquote><span class="noexcerpt">''Not to be confused with [[Trannies|Gender Dysphoria]].''</span></blockquote>{{Gemerald}}[[File:Oldfaggot.jpg|thumb|A Sufferer of Oldfag Dysphoria, displaying symptoms.]]
#REDIRECT [[Matthew Patricks]]
'''Oldfag Dysphoria''' is a condition that causes a person who browses imageboards to believe they have been using the board for a lot longer than most people on the site, or that they should have been "born" an oldfag but for some reason are a stinky newGOD instead. The affected may sometimes believe that the date he joined (Ex. 2019) is enough to qualify him/xim as an [[oldfag]], even if most other users would not agree. Some sufferers may choose to identify as an oldfag, in other words, transitioning into becoming a "real" oldfag though that rarely ends up working out. The condition has seen a massive increase in recent years, and it is underlying cause is currently unknown. It is important not to call a sufferer a "[[newfag]]" or a "faggot", as this often leads to the suicide of the affected.
 
== Symptoms ==
 
* Use of [[Archaism|archaic words]] or mannerisms
* Bragging about being an oldfag
* [[711chan|Making a website based off of a defunct altchan, and pretending its the original site]]
* Downloading images with unix timestamp filenames that begin with 13 or 14 from 4chan archives and posting them, even [[though]] that would mean the image was first posted around 2011-2016
 
== On the 'arty ==
Some 'teens LARP as le hecking sootists who miss they oldfag memes like dem mental asylum and sproke and niggerweed. Whenever you see one of these insecure niggers (aryans albeit), remind them that oldCHADs hate it when people shit on newGODs (since that's hecking and friggin 4cucked)
 
== Treatment ==
 
* [[File:1986 - SoyBooru (1).png|thumb|A sufferer of Oldfag Dysphoria beginning his Transition therapy for the day.]]Browsing Desuarchive and/or Encyclopedia Dramatica (even doe this only makes it worse)
* Becoming a 4chan [[Jannies|Janitor]] (this too makes it worse)
 
== THE REAL TREATMENT ==
 
* Killing yourself, preferably livestreamed so I can laugh at you while you do it
* Coming to terms with the fact that you will never be an oldfag
* Worshipping NewGODs instead (though this can lead to problems in and of itself)
 
== See Also ==
 
* [[Self-insert syndrome|Self Insert Syndrome]]
[[Category:Mental_health]]

Revision as of 17:17, 5 October 2023

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