Science: Difference between revisions
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[[File:I F*CKING LOVE SCIENCE.jpg|thumb|Average science believer.]] | [[File:I F*CKING LOVE SCIENCE.jpg|thumb|Average science believer.]] | ||
Science is the de-facto religion of North America and Western Europe. Roughly 20% of the population of these countries pledge themselves to the Science. | Science is the de-facto religion of North America and Western Europe. Roughly 20% of the population of these countries pledge themselves to the Science. Science is currently the state religion of many European and American countries. | ||
== Etymology == | == Etymology == | ||
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The lowest class of religious leaders are soy boys. The soy boys use shaming and ostracization tactics in order to force civilians into bowing before the religion. | The lowest class of religious leaders are soy boys. The soy boys use shaming and ostracization tactics in order to force civilians into bowing before the religion. | ||
== Notable Holy Figures == | |||
* Anthony Fauci | |||
* Albert Einstein | |||
* Neil deGrasse Tyson (black) | |||
* Bill Nye | |||
* Contrapoints | |||
== The Devil in Science == | |||
What is comparable to the devil in abrahamic religions is a broad spectrum or people, ideas, events, or organizations, these may include: | |||
* Donald Trump | |||
* Anti-Vaxxers | |||
* "Karens" | |||
* Flat Earth | |||
* Dino-Trutherism | |||
* Dad | |||
* "The Dark Ages" | |||
Revision as of 13:23, 1 April 2021
Science is the de-facto religion of North America and Western Europe. Roughly 20% of the population of these countries pledge themselves to the Science. Science is currently the state religion of many European and American countries.
Etymology
Science derives from the Latin "scientia", meaning knowledge. This is ironical, as the teachings of Science have no basis in reality.
Beliefs
The religion of Science dictates that the Earth is in fact a ball floating in mid-air, and that a force called "gravity" is what keeps the Australians from falling off.
Science preaches that life is utterly meaningless, and that we ought to all just kill ourselves.
Practices
Many rituals are done by Science worshippers, the most famous being: killing babies, stabbing new-borns, taking meds, eating bugs, wearing the mask, clapping for health heroes and buying from conglomerates. It is believed that if these are not done then the North Pole will stop being ice, flooding everything.
History
It is unknown at what point Science gained control, but by 2020 Science was expected to be completely accepted by all civilians and followed devotedly.
Hierarchy
Billionaires are the ruling elite of Science. Despite their usual lack of formal scientific training their word is unquestionable.
The second most powerful members of the hierarchy are priests called "Scientists". These Scientists often claim that they have evidence. The evidence however is usually in the form of long, meaningless lists of numbers and some diagrams, or contradicting photos of Earth from "space".
The lowest class of religious leaders are soy boys. The soy boys use shaming and ostracization tactics in order to force civilians into bowing before the religion.
Notable Holy Figures
- Anthony Fauci
- Albert Einstein
- Neil deGrasse Tyson (black)
- Bill Nye
- Contrapoints
The Devil in Science
What is comparable to the devil in abrahamic religions is a broad spectrum or people, ideas, events, or organizations, these may include:
- Donald Trump
- Anti-Vaxxers
- "Karens"
- Flat Earth
- Dino-Trutherism
- Dad
- "The Dark Ages"
