How to make soyjaks: Difference between revisions

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This page is meant as a definitive guide on how to make a [[Soyjak|'jak]] and avoid common pitfalls of new 'jakkers.
This page is meant as a definitive guide on how to make a [[Soyjak|'jak]] and avoid common pitfalls of new 'jakkers.


{{Spoiler|I sould point out that I myself am not a 'jakker and haven't made a single 'jak thus far. I'm just relaying what I found while browsing the 'arty and hoping that some drawCHAD makes a guide for me.|style=kolyma}}
== Setup ==
 
 
On how to make a soyjak, you need something to set your stuff up, preferably;
 
* An operating system with the Linux-libre kernel so that you don't get buttfucked by glowies
* Access to your neighbours' Wi-Fi without their knowledge
* Hard drive encryption software like VeraCrypt
* A microwave nearby so you can fry your HDD at any given moment
* A painting program, preferably either Pinta or GIMP
* Practice making shapes
* Then, if the practice is done, you should be able to make a soyjak, just don't make a dusty jak (see 2nd section)


==How NOT to make 'jaks==
==How NOT to make 'jaks==
[[File:Jak guidelines.png|thumb]]
[[File:Jak guidelines.png|thumb]]
Avoid things mentioned in this section and you hopefully won't be the one to create [[Poopson]].
You WILL avoid things mentioned in this section<s> and, hopefully, you won't be the one to create [[Poopson]]</s>.


''I just realised what gives jaks that [[Variant:Unknown|variant:unknown]] look''
''I just realised what gives jaks that [[Variant:Unknown|variant:unknown]] look''
*''[[Antialiasing]]''
*''Antialiasing''
*''Thick eyebrows''
*''Thick eyebrows''
*''Iris''
*''Iris''
Line 15: Line 25:
*''No forehead wrinkes/mouth lines''
*''No forehead wrinkes/mouth lines''
*''Stubble made up of the same lines''
*''Stubble made up of the same lines''
Remember that 'jaks are kind of like the free market (oh my lolbertarianism) and that if yours doesn't really have a purpose for existing, a niche so to say, it probably won't be used by other 'teens that much.<gallery>
Remember that 'jaks are kind of like the free market (oh my lolbertarianism) and that if yours doesn't really have a purpose for existing, a niche so to say, it probably won't be used by other 'teens that much.
 
[[Fact|'''''<big>FACT</big>''''']]''''':''''' If one has to force a variant than it most likely wasn't good to begin with.
<gallery>
File:1694891131691.png| Another set of guidelines; take them with a grain of salt thoughever
File:1694891131691.png| Another set of guidelines; take them with a grain of salt thoughever
</gallery>
</gallery>

Latest revision as of 20:41, 24 April 2024

This page is meant as a definitive guide on how to make a 'jak and avoid common pitfalls of new 'jakkers.

Setup

On how to make a soyjak, you need something to set your stuff up, preferably;

  • An operating system with the Linux-libre kernel so that you don't get buttfucked by glowies
  • Access to your neighbours' Wi-Fi without their knowledge
  • Hard drive encryption software like VeraCrypt
  • A microwave nearby so you can fry your HDD at any given moment
  • A painting program, preferably either Pinta or GIMP
  • Practice making shapes
  • Then, if the practice is done, you should be able to make a soyjak, just don't make a dusty jak (see 2nd section)

How NOT to make 'jaks

You WILL avoid things mentioned in this section and, hopefully, you won't be the one to create Poopson.

I just realised what gives jaks that variant:unknown look

  • Antialiasing
  • Thick eyebrows
  • Iris
  • No glasses handles
  • No forehead wrinkes/mouth lines
  • Stubble made up of the same lines

Remember that 'jaks are kind of like the free market (oh my lolbertarianism) and that if yours doesn't really have a purpose for existing, a niche so to say, it probably won't be used by other 'teens that much.

FACT: If one has to force a variant than it most likely wasn't good to begin with.