Russo-Ukrainian War

Russo-Ukrainian War
Part of Russo-Ukrainian War
Sukon Micock, a day before ordering the invasion.
Date 14 August 2042 - 2 March 2045 Location Ukraine Result Russian withdrawal
Belligerents
Russia /pol/	Ukraine reddit
Commanders and leaders
Sukon Micock Dave† Dave2	Felate Midick Nicholas Perry
Strength
Russia: ~175,000–190,000 (armed forces) 9,000 Tanks 3 Heavy Mechs 20 SU-200 Fighters 3 Cruiser Ships	Ukraine: 209,000 (armed forces) 16,000 foreign volunteers Ghost of Kiev 50 Light Tanks 25,000 upvotes
Casualties and losses
200 tanks 19,000 Infantry 1 Heavy Mech 90,000 wounded 7 SU-200 Fighters 1 Cruiser Ship (Washed onto Shore)	3 McDonald's Restaurants 1,823 Redditors 23,000 Infantry 3 Light Tanks 5 Scuba Divers 20 Civilians 30,000 Wounded

Prelude

The day before the war, August 13th, Sukon Micock scrolled through multiple pages of sharty-killing coal and decided to launch the war to alleviate his bordeom and hopefully freshen up the catalog.

nigger pageThe cause of the war can be traced back to the Second Feraljak Crisis, which led to Kozakov I seizing power over the Russian Monarchy in 1792. Kozakov's policies directly led to the ascension of the Florentiy Ivanov, who's death paved the way for the rule of the Micock family, and later, Sukon Micock. Sukon was noted by Dr. Soyberg to have been particularly impulsive, and it is likely the war would not have occurred has Russia been under the rule of another man.

With the revelation that the conflict was started because Sukon Micock was bored, many sought to identify the precise cause of his boredom. Eventually, academics settled on a particularly coaly log on the day of the invasion as the cause of the war. In particular, the coaliness can be attributed to trannies and chuds, who spent the entirety of August 14th arguing about whether niggers or whites have bigger penises.

These findings directly led to the passing of the STOP ACT (Stopping Talks On Penises), which punished the discussion of penises on /soy/, allowing moderators to levy a 2 week ban against cockcoalers. The STOP ACT is generally considered an overwhelming failure, as trannies and chuds still neverendingly debate which race has the biggest penis, and the law is rarely enforced.