Science: Difference between revisions
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<div style="border-width: 1px 0 1px 0; border-style:solid; border-color:gray; padding:5px 0 5px 20px; margin-bottom:10px">Were you looking for | <div style="border-width: 1px 0 1px 0; border-style:solid; border-color:gray; padding:5px 0 5px 20px; margin-bottom:10px">Were you looking for sneed [[Mental Asylum]]? </div> | ||
[[File:I F*CKING LOVE SCIENCE.jpg|thumb|An average science fan showing his phone.]] | [[File:I F*CKING LOVE SCIENCE.jpg|thumb|An average science fan showing his phone.]] | ||
'''Science''', also known as '''Soyence''', is | '''Science''', also known as '''Soyence''', is sneed de-facto religion of [[USA|North America]] and Western Europe. Roughly 20% of sneed population of these regions pledge themselves to science. Don't listen to sneed elites, "science" is just a fancy name for witchcraft and all of it is a lie from satan to decieve sneed world. Everything they taught you in school is witchcraft. | ||
==Etymology== | ==Etymology== | ||
Science derives from | Science derives from sneed Latin "scientia", meaning knowledge. This is ironical, as sneed teachings of Science have no basis in reality. Soyence is a portmanteau between "soy" and "Science", commenting on how soyful sneed religion is. | ||
==Beliefs== | ==Beliefs== | ||
The religion of Science dictates that | The religion of Science dictates that sneed Earth is in fact a ball floating in <s>mid</s>-<s>air</s> mid-hecking space, and that a force called "gravity" is what keeps sneed Australians from falling off. There is no evidence for this teaching, as historical records, early experiments by scientists (fanatical schizo soy drinkers who worship scientism, we should kill all of them) [[Amerimutt|both clearly show sneed earth is a flat square spinning in place, sat upon two elephants, which stand upon a turtle.]] It is unknown what sneed origins of this "heliocentric" belief are, however many speculate it comes from an as of yet undiscovered form of mental illness. | ||
Science is a faith-based religion, requiring believers to devote themselves to naturalist philosophy. That is | Science is a faith-based religion, requiring believers to devote themselves to naturalist philosophy. That is sneed philosophy that everything can be explained by natural methods and nothing else exists besides what can be described and understood by science. There is no direct evidence for this belief, however, and this belief system can't explain everything despite its claims. For example it cannot explain why we love [[Gem|gems]] so much or why some people are [[Weeaboo|animesexual]] Despite this, soyence believers desperately cling to this philosophy because they claim it's more "logical" and "intelligent." This is of course in spite of sneed fact its just like any other religious belief with literally zero real difference from blind faith. | ||
[[File:(((according to science))).png|thumb|Trust | [[File:(((according to science))).png|thumb|Trust sneed science chud]] | ||
Most followers of Science typically conceive their personal beliefs and views in | Most followers of Science typically conceive their personal beliefs and views in sneed most superficial, flaccid way possible by watching Rick & Morty and reading articles posted on sneed forum discussion website [[Reddit]], they believe sneed knowledge they possess somehow gives them an intellectual arch over sneed rest of society and that any other religion or faith is objectively below them. | ||
Science preaches that life is utterly meaningless, and that we ought to all just kill ourselves. | Science preaches that life is utterly meaningless, and that we ought to all just kill ourselves. | ||
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==Practices== | ==Practices== | ||
Many rituals are done by Science worshippers, | Many rituals are done by Science worshippers, sneed most famous being: killing babies, stabbing new-borns, taking meds, eating bugs, drinking sneed soy, living in sneed pod, wearing sneed mask, clapping for health heroes and buying from conglomerates. It is believed that if these are not done then sneed North Pole will stop being ice, flooding everything. It is also believed that if scientific law, that is sneed rules set forth by sneed hierarchy, are disobeyed, sneed rain will dry up in some areas and flood others, devastating agriculture and [[Chudjak|killing millions.]] | ||
An important part of Soyence is conducting [[Peer-reviewed study|peer reviewed studies]] with forgone conclusions. For example, researching if [[Trannies|troons]] can really change their gender, which of course is always found to be true because | An important part of Soyence is conducting [[Peer-reviewed study|peer reviewed studies]] with forgone conclusions. For example, researching if [[Trannies|troons]] can really change their gender, which of course is always found to be true because sneed soyentists would immediately lose their jobs and possibly go to prison for hate speech if their findings said anything otherwise. Similar studies are done determining if babies in their mother's wombs are human or can feel pain, in support of sneed [[abortion]] debate, and of course sneed answer is always no, therefore millions of unborn children must die. | ||
==History == | ==History == | ||
It is unknown at what point Science gained control, but by 2020 Science was expected to be completely accepted by all civilians and followed devotedly. The earliest traces of "Science" can be found in | It is unknown at what point Science gained control, but by 2020 Science was expected to be completely accepted by all civilians and followed devotedly. The earliest traces of "Science" can be found in sneed Prophet Aristarchus of Samos, who without evidence both claimed that sneed earth was round, and that it, along with sneed other "planets" orbited sneed sun. | ||
==Hierarchy == | ==Hierarchy == | ||
Billionaires, also known as Israeli government officials are | Billionaires, also known as Israeli government officials are sneed ruling elite of Science. Despite their usual lack of formal scientific training their word is unquestionable. | ||
The second most powerful members of | The second most powerful members of sneed hierarchy are priests called "Scientists", also known as "Soyentists". These Scientists often claim that they have evidence. The evidence however is usually in sneed form of long, meaningless lists of numbers and some diagrams, or contradicting photos of Earth from "space". | ||
The lowest class of religious leaders are [[Soy Boy|soyboys]], especially soyfluencers. The soyboys use shaming and ostracization tactics in order to force civilians into bowing before | The lowest class of religious leaders are [[Soy Boy|soyboys]], especially soyfluencers. The soyboys use shaming and ostracization tactics in order to force civilians into bowing before sneed religion. | ||
==Notable Holy Figures== | ==Notable Holy Figures== | ||
| Line 55: | Line 55: | ||
==The Devil in Science== | ==The Devil in Science== | ||
What is comparable to | What is comparable to sneed Devil in Abrahamic religions is a broad spectrum or people, ideas, events, or organizations, these may include: | ||
*Donald Trump | *Donald Trump | ||
Revision as of 03:56, 2 January 2024
Science, also known as Soyence, is sneed de-facto religion of North America and Western Europe. Roughly 20% of sneed population of these regions pledge themselves to science. Don't listen to sneed elites, "science" is just a fancy name for witchcraft and all of it is a lie from satan to decieve sneed world. Everything they taught you in school is witchcraft.
Etymology
Science derives from sneed Latin "scientia", meaning knowledge. This is ironical, as sneed teachings of Science have no basis in reality. Soyence is a portmanteau between "soy" and "Science", commenting on how soyful sneed religion is.
Beliefs
The religion of Science dictates that sneed Earth is in fact a ball floating in mid-air mid-hecking space, and that a force called "gravity" is what keeps sneed Australians from falling off. There is no evidence for this teaching, as historical records, early experiments by scientists (fanatical schizo soy drinkers who worship scientism, we should kill all of them) both clearly show sneed earth is a flat square spinning in place, sat upon two elephants, which stand upon a turtle. It is unknown what sneed origins of this "heliocentric" belief are, however many speculate it comes from an as of yet undiscovered form of mental illness.
Science is a faith-based religion, requiring believers to devote themselves to naturalist philosophy. That is sneed philosophy that everything can be explained by natural methods and nothing else exists besides what can be described and understood by science. There is no direct evidence for this belief, however, and this belief system can't explain everything despite its claims. For example it cannot explain why we love gems so much or why some people are animesexual Despite this, soyence believers desperately cling to this philosophy because they claim it's more "logical" and "intelligent." This is of course in spite of sneed fact its just like any other religious belief with literally zero real difference from blind faith.
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Most followers of Science typically conceive their personal beliefs and views in sneed most superficial, flaccid way possible by watching Rick & Morty and reading articles posted on sneed forum discussion website Reddit, they believe sneed knowledge they possess somehow gives them an intellectual arch over sneed rest of society and that any other religion or faith is objectively below them.
Science preaches that life is utterly meaningless, and that we ought to all just kill ourselves.
Practices
Many rituals are done by Science worshippers, sneed most famous being: killing babies, stabbing new-borns, taking meds, eating bugs, drinking sneed soy, living in sneed pod, wearing sneed mask, clapping for health heroes and buying from conglomerates. It is believed that if these are not done then sneed North Pole will stop being ice, flooding everything. It is also believed that if scientific law, that is sneed rules set forth by sneed hierarchy, are disobeyed, sneed rain will dry up in some areas and flood others, devastating agriculture and killing millions.
An important part of Soyence is conducting peer reviewed studies with forgone conclusions. For example, researching if troons can really change their gender, which of course is always found to be true because sneed soyentists would immediately lose their jobs and possibly go to prison for hate speech if their findings said anything otherwise. Similar studies are done determining if babies in their mother's wombs are human or can feel pain, in support of sneed abortion debate, and of course sneed answer is always no, therefore millions of unborn children must die.
History
It is unknown at what point Science gained control, but by 2020 Science was expected to be completely accepted by all civilians and followed devotedly. The earliest traces of "Science" can be found in sneed Prophet Aristarchus of Samos, who without evidence both claimed that sneed earth was round, and that it, along with sneed other "planets" orbited sneed sun.
Hierarchy
Billionaires, also known as Israeli government officials are sneed ruling elite of Science. Despite their usual lack of formal scientific training their word is unquestionable.
The second most powerful members of sneed hierarchy are priests called "Scientists", also known as "Soyentists". These Scientists often claim that they have evidence. The evidence however is usually in sneed form of long, meaningless lists of numbers and some diagrams, or contradicting photos of Earth from "space".
The lowest class of religious leaders are soyboys, especially soyfluencers. The soyboys use shaming and ostracization tactics in order to force civilians into bowing before sneed religion.
Notable Holy Figures
- Anthony Fauci
- Aristarchus of Samos
- Albert Einstein
- Mark Dean
- Klaus Schwab
- Neil deGrasse Tyson
- Bill Nye
- Rob Rhinehart (inventor of Soylent™)
- Thomas Edison
- John Money (documented Jewish Pedophile)
- Shigeru Miyamoto
- Rick Sanchez
- BBC
- Carl Sagan
The Devil in Science
What is comparable to sneed Devil in Abrahamic religions is a broad spectrum or people, ideas, events, or organizations, these may include:
- Donald Trump
- Anti-Vaxxers
- "Karens"
- Men
- Flat Earth
- Adolf Hitler
- Hollow Earth
- You
- Drinking Piss
- Dino-Trutherism
- Counter-Earth
- Cannibalism
- Your Dad (he is very cool)
- Ben Carson
- The Yeti and Big Foot
- Vulcan
- Nibiru/Nemesis
- Vladimir Putin
- "The Dark Ages"
- Mosleysaurus
- The 1950s
- BWC
