List of controversial soyjak variants: Difference between revisions

From Soyjak Wiki, The Free Soycyclopedia
Jump to navigationJump to search
VisualWikitext
No edit summary
(don't litter lazy nigger)
 
(39 intermediate revisions by 25 users not shown)
Line 1: Line 1:
[[File:Tyronius Floyd.png|thumb|Freshmen at the University of Minnesota attending a lecture on critical BBC theory, 2021 ]]'''Critical BBC Theory (CBBCT)''' is a ficticious unified cosmological theory of everything revolving around the superiority of Big Black Cock (BBC.) According to neo-Nazi right-wing schizophrenic chudcels who forgot to take their meds, CBBCT is a CIA funded form of post-modern liberal propaganda that is taught at all levels K-12 in American public schools. However, according to snopes.com,  there is absolutely no evidence whatsoever to indicate that CBBCT indoctrination is actually happening.  
==== There are certain [[soyjak]] variants considered by some [[soyjak.party]] posters to be [[spam]] and/or [[coal]] rather than [[Gem|gems]]. The most common of which are documented here. ====
{| class="wikitable"
!Name
!Description
!Example
|-
|[[Cobson]]
|A soyjak traced from the character Jobe Smith from the movie ''The Lawnmower Man''. His status as either a gem or coal is a topic of debate to this day.
|[[File:Cobson.svg|center|thumb|150x150px|Probably the most controversial variant]]
|-
|[[Flartson]]
|Traced from a [[Tiktok]] video spammed on the 'cuck of user @chezpierrealtea. Some 'teens think it's [[The_coal_that_destroyed_the_sharty|the coal that killed the sharty]].
|[[File:Flartson.png|center|thumb|150x150px|flartson or something]]
|-
|[[Impish Soyak Ears|Swedish wins/fails]]
|Regular [[Wholesome Soyjak|wholesomejak]] edited to have imp-like facial features
|[[File:Swedejak.png|center|thumb|150x150px|The most popular [[Impish Soyak Ears|swedish <s>fail</s> win]]]]
|-
|[[Colorfuljaks]]
|Regular [[Wholesome Soyjak|wholesome soyjak]] painted on with vibrant colors.
|[[File:Original colorfuljak.png|center|thumb|150x150px|Colorful edit of a [[Wholesome Soyjak|wholesome 'jak]].]]
|-
|[[Deformed Soyjak|Deformedjaks]]
|Regular [[Wholesome Soyjak|wholesome soyjak]] distorted with a warp tool.
|[[File:Deformed Soyjak.png|center|thumb|150x150px|The original [[Deformed Soyjak|deformed soyjak]].]]
|-
|[[Colorfuljaks#Grayjaks|Grayjaks]]
|Regular [[soyjak]] painted gray.
|[[File:Grayjakplier.png|center|thumb|150x150px|Grayjak version of a [[Markiplier Soyjak|Markiplierjak]].]]
|-
|[[Dogjak]]
|A trace of a [[Animal|dog]]
|[[File:Dogjakoriginal.png|center|thumb|150x150px|A 'jakked version of a [[Animal|dog]].]]
|
|-
|[[Massjak]]
|A [[Wholesome Soyjak|wholesomejak]] edit
|[[File:Skof.png|center|thumb|150x150px|The Massjak]]
|
|-
|[[Soylita]]
|A wholesomejak edited to be a young girl
|[[File:4327 - SoyBooru.png|thumb|center|150x150px|Soylita herself]]
|
|-
|[[Babyjak|Babyjaks]]
|A heavily compressed soyjak variant
|[[File:Babyjak.png|thumb|center|150x150px|A babyjak]]
|
|-
|[[Smugjak]]
|A smug soyjak traced from the movie Megamind
|[[File:30134 - SoyBooru.png|Smug neckbeard|thumb|center|150x150px]]
|
|-
|[[Amerimutt#Impish mutt|Impish mutt]]
|An edit of [[Impish Soyak Ears|The Swede]] based off of the Amerimutt or something like that. Extremely controversial among American users, and the main point of contention in the [[Mutt-Euro War]] or whatever.
|[[File:REAL MUTT.png|thumb|center|150px]]
|}


== Overview ==
[[Category:Lists]]
Even if CBBCT did exist (which it DOES NOT,) no white person would ever be capable of understanding it due to the implicit bias inherent in their subconscious. The only group of people that would be qualified to understand CBBCT (which DOES NOT actually exist,) is Black/Brown inner-city elders who have a doctoral degree in CBBCT from MIT University. These educated Black/brown elders from MIT have scientifically proven that white people would never be able to understand CBBCT (if it even existed in the first place) due to their implicit bias and lack of lived experiences. Thus, speaking speaking about CBBCT as a white person is equivalent to violence against Black Lives.
 
If CBBCT were real (which IT IS NOT,) then it would be impossible to write down any of its main ideas on paper. Since the white man invented writing, there is no way to write down anything that is not institutionally racist. The only way to learn about CBBCT would be through the oral tradition of the Zulu nation, passed down from generation to generation since the beginning of time.

Latest revision as of 09:21, 7 March 2024

There are certain soyjak variants considered by some soyjak.party posters to be spam and/or coal rather than gems. The most common of which are documented here.

Name Description Example
Cobson A soyjak traced from the character Jobe Smith from the movie The Lawnmower Man. His status as either a gem or coal is a topic of debate to this day.
Probably the most controversial variant
Flartson Traced from a Tiktok video spammed on the 'cuck of user @chezpierrealtea. Some 'teens think it's the coal that killed the sharty.
flartson or something
Swedish wins/fails Regular wholesomejak edited to have imp-like facial features
The most popular swedish fail win
Colorfuljaks Regular wholesome soyjak painted on with vibrant colors.
Colorful edit of a wholesome 'jak.
Deformedjaks Regular wholesome soyjak distorted with a warp tool.
The original deformed soyjak.
Grayjaks Regular soyjak painted gray.
Grayjak version of a Markiplierjak.
Dogjak A trace of a dog
A 'jakked version of a dog.
Massjak A wholesomejak edit
The Massjak
Soylita A wholesomejak edited to be a young girl
Soylita herself
Babyjaks A heavily compressed soyjak variant
A babyjak
Smugjak A smug soyjak traced from the movie Megamind
Smug neckbeard
Impish mutt An edit of The Swede based off of the Amerimutt or something like that. Extremely controversial among American users, and the main point of contention in the Mutt-Euro War or whatever.
Retrieved from "https://soyjakwiki.net/index.php?title=List_of_controversial_soyjak_variants&oldid=94381"