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We at war
{{CIAContentHelping}}
We at war with terrorism, racism
[[File:CobsonCIA.png|alt=A CIA agent portrayed as a soyjak. Note warm, friendly glow emanating from him.|thumb|200x200px|A {{Glow|CIA}} agent portrayed as a soyjak. Note the warm, friendly, {{Glow|glow }} emanating from him. ]]
But most of all we at war with ourselves
{{Glow|'''CIA'''}} or the {{Glow|'''Central Intelligence Agency'''}} is an American intelligence service. The {{Glow|CIA}} and its staff members are widely featured in pop culture and memes.  [[Kuz|███]]<nowiki/> was once an agent, too.


(Jesus walk)
{{Glow|CIA}} agents are said to emanate a warm and friendly {{Glow|glow}}, so much so that they {{Glow|glow}} in the dark. 
God show me the way because the Devil's tryna break me down
(Jesus walk with me)


You know what the Midwest is? Young and restless
You may know some of the {{Glow|CIA}}'s famous psychological operations, such as [[Operation 67]], a {{Glow|CIA}} effort to wipe all traces of [[Thrembo]] from the internet, and obscure it's existence to the public. Despite what [[Chudjak|chuds]] say about the negative nature of this operation, the motive behind it was profoundly positive - done to protect the world's population from [[trannies]], who intended to use thrembo to mathematically prove they could, in fact, become real women (even doe Gödel mathematically proved trannies really can't be women so marge). Through biological agents known as [[schizo|"schizo]] [[meds]]", the {{Glow|CIA}} has altered the brains of most of the world's population to remove all knowledge of thrembo, or Operation 67. This, however, has had the unfortunate side effect of  ████ ████ ████ ████████████ ████ ██████ ███ ██████ █ ████ ██████ ██████ █ ███ ████ ███ ███ ████████ ███ ███ ████ █████ ██████ █ ███ ███ ██████ █████ ███ ████ ███ ██████ significant threat to ████ ███ ████ ██████ █████ █████ █████ ██ ████ ███████ ███ █████ ███ ██ ████ ████ █ ████ █████ ████ at least 13,000,000 affected, likely ████ █████ █████ ████ ████████ ███ ████ ██ ██████ [[trannies|genitals were destroyed]] ███████████ ████ ███████ █████████ ████ ██ ███ ████████ ███████ █ █████████ 
Where restless (Niggas) might snatch your necklace
And next these (Niggas) might jack your Lexus
Somebody tell these (Niggas) who Kanye West is
I walk through the valley of the Chi where death is
Top floor the view alone will leave you breathless
Try to catch it it's kinda hard
Getting choked by detectives, yeah, yeah, now check the method
They be askin' us questions, harass and arrest us
Sayin' "We eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast"
Huh? Y'all eat pieces of shit? What's the basis?
We ain't going nowhere but got suits and cases
A trunk full of coke, rental car from Avis
My mama used to say only Jesus can save us
Well mama I know I act a fool
But I'll be gone 'til November, I got packs to move
I hope


(Jesus walk)
CIA bad because...ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm they just are, okay 
God show me the way because the Devil's tryna break me down
(Jesus walk with me)
The only thing that I pray is that my feet don't fail me now
(Jesus walk)
And I don't think there's nothin' I can do now to right my wrongs
(Jesus walk with me)
I wanna talk to God but I'm afraid 'cause we ain't spoke in so long
(Jesus walk)
God show me the way because the Devil's tryna break me down
(Jesus walk with me)
The only thing that I pray is that my feet don't fail me now
(Jesus walk)
And I don't think there's nothin' I can do now to right my wrongs
(Jesus walk with me)
I wanna talk to God but I'm afraid 'cause we ain't spoke in so long
So long, so long
(Jesus walk with me)


To the hustlers, killers, murderers, drug dealers, even the scrippers
==In Pop Culture==
(Jesus walks for them)
CIA was <s>the man</s> the [[Selfish Little Fuck|selfish little fuck]] who was sent to capture ███ ███ ███. This undertaking proved to be █████ ████ as a result of ██████████████, and when ███ ███ ███ learnt of this, he invited CIA over for a cup of tea, which he happily accepted. They then proceeded to chat merrily about their lives. CIA then exited the residence of ███ ███ ███ in a safe and calm manner, and returned home, unharmed.
To the victims of welfare feel we livin' in Hell here, hell yeah
(Jesus walks for them)
Now, hear ye, hear ye, want to see Thee more clearly
I know He hear me when my feet get weary
'Cause we're the almost nearly extinct
We rappers is role models: we rap, we don't think
I ain't here to argue about His facial features
Or here to convert atheists into believers
I'm just tryna say the way school need teachers
The way Kathie Lee needed Regis, that's the way I need Jesus
So here go my single, dawg, radio needs this
They say you can rap about anything except for Jesus
That means guns, sex, lies, videotape
But if I talk about God my record won't get played, huh?
Well if this take away from my spins
Which'll probably take away from my ends
Then I hope this take away from my sins
And bring the day that I'm dreamin' about
Next time I'm in the club, everybody screamin' out


(Jesus walk)
Upon learning that CIA had failed his mission, he was ███ ███ ████ ███ ████ ████████ █████████ ████ ████████ █████ ██ ███████████ ███ ███ ████████ ██ ██ ███████████ ███ ████ Soylent™ █████ ████ ███ ████ █████ ███ ██████████ ████ █████ ████ █ ████████ ██████ ███████ ████ ███████████ ████████ ███ ███ ████ █████ ████ ████ ████ ██ ███ █████ ███████ ██ ███ █████ ████████ ███ ████ ██ ████ ████████ ██████ ████ ████████ ███ ██ ██ ███ ██ ████ █████ ███████ ███████ ██ ████ ██ ███ ████████ ████ █████ █████████ according to [[Kuz|Kuznetsov]]. ███ ████ ██ █████████ ████ ████████ ██████████ ███ █████████ ██ ███ ██████ █████ ███████ ███████
God show me the way because the Devil's tryna break me down
 
(Jesus walk with me)
████ ████ ██ █████ █████ █████ ███ ████ █████ ███ allegedly caused by ████ ████ ██████ ███████ ███████ ██ █████ ███ ████████ ████████ ██ █ ██████ ███ █ █████ ████ ████████ ██████  the ████ ███████████ █ ███ ██████ ███ ████ ████ ████ ██ ████████ ███████ ████ ███ ██████ ████ █ ████████ ████████ ████ ███████ █████ ████ ███ █████ █████ 300 boxes of CheesyNiggers™ ██████ ████████ ████ ████████ ████████████ ██ ████████ ███████████ "Cobson" ███ ████ █████████ ███████ ████ ████ ███ ████ █████ ████ ███████ ██ ████████ DO NOT APPROACH HIM, HE ████ █████ ██████ █████ ████████ ███ ████████ ████ █████████ ████████ [[Sproke|████████]] ██ ████ HIGHLY DANGEROUS. ███████ ████ ████ █ █████████ ██████ ████████ ██ ████ ████ ███ ████ ██████████████████ ████████ ████████ █████████ █████ ███ █████████ ███████ ██████ █████ ███ ██████████ █████ ███████ ██ █████████ ███ [[Kuz's Death|successfully killed]] and replaced with [[Doll|operative "Doll"]] ████████ ██████████ ███ ██ ████████ ██ ████ █████████ ███ ████ ████████ ███ ████████ █████ ████ ████ ████████ ███████ ███ ██████ ██ ███ ██████ ██ ████████ ████  ████ ██████ ██ █████ ███████ █████ ████ ██████ ██ █████████ ████ ████ ███████ ██ though.
The only thing that I pray is that my feet don't fail me now
 
And CIA also created [[The Doors|████████]], doe. And they're also collecting data from you via the [[Pepe#Steganography_datamining_strips|memes you share on the internet.]] If you're a good goy, they might even send you to a trip to "Planet Dirt" where you may live in a pod aboard "USS kamikaze" and feast on delicious red and black liquens for the rest of your life.
 
==Gallery==
<gallery>
File:TDKRcia.png|The man nicknamed {{Glow|CIA}} doesn't exist, disregard this image, forget [[You]] ever viewed it.
File:CIA trio.png|A [[Soyjak Trio|Soyjak trio]] of {{Glow|CIA}} agents.
File:CIAmoon.jpg|{{Greentext|>THE HOLES IN THE MOON ARE NOT A RESULT OF A GIANT TAPEWORM BURROWING ITS WAY THROUGH THE SURFACE TO THE CORE WHERE IT LIVES}}
</gallery>
 
== See also ==
[[CIA and its tactics to control chans]]
 
==Notes==
https://mega.nz/folder/0zdDwRAY#8QsX_8-c4kMN0CEqKrRUFA
 
https://patents.google.com/patent/US6813330
 
https://cryptome.org/2012/07/gent-forum-spies.htm
 
{{Shut it down}}
 
[[Category:Institutions]]
[[Category:Shitposting]]
[[Category:TRVTH]]
<references />
 
{{Corner|br|[[File:CIA-test2.png]]}}

Latest revision as of 22:49, 18 February 2024

This page is about the CIA, and may be vandalized by angry chuds from time to time. Remember that the CIA are the good guys, and any slander you read about them is decisively false.
A CIA agent portrayed as a soyjak. Note warm, friendly glow emanating from him.
A CIA agent portrayed as a soyjak. Note the warm, friendly, glow emanating from him.

CIA or the Central Intelligence Agency is an American intelligence service. The CIA and its staff members are widely featured in pop culture and memes. ███ was once an agent, too.

CIA agents are said to emanate a warm and friendly glow, so much so that they glow in the dark.

You may know some of the CIA's famous psychological operations, such as Operation 67, a CIA effort to wipe all traces of Thrembo from the internet, and obscure it's existence to the public. Despite what chuds say about the negative nature of this operation, the motive behind it was profoundly positive - done to protect the world's population from trannies, who intended to use thrembo to mathematically prove they could, in fact, become real women (even doe Gödel mathematically proved trannies really can't be women so marge). Through biological agents known as "schizo meds", the CIA has altered the brains of most of the world's population to remove all knowledge of thrembo, or Operation 67. This, however, has had the unfortunate side effect of ████ ████ ████ ████████████ ████ ██████ ███ ██████ █ ████ ██████ ██████ █ ███ ████ ███ ███ ████████ ███ ███ ████ █████ ██████ █ ███ ███ ██████ █████ ███ ████ ███ ██████ significant threat to ████ ███ ████ ██████ █████ █████ █████ ██ ████ ███████ ███ █████ ███ ██ ████ ████ █ ████ █████ ████ at least 13,000,000 affected, likely ████ █████ █████ ████ ████████ ███ ████ ██ ██████ genitals were destroyed ███████████ ████ ███████ █████████ ████ ██ ███ ████████ ███████ █ █████████

CIA bad because...ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm they just are, okay

In Pop Culture

CIA was the man the selfish little fuck who was sent to capture ███ ███ ███. This undertaking proved to be █████ ████ as a result of ██████████████, and when ███ ███ ███ learnt of this, he invited CIA over for a cup of tea, which he happily accepted. They then proceeded to chat merrily about their lives. CIA then exited the residence of ███ ███ ███ in a safe and calm manner, and returned home, unharmed.

Upon learning that CIA had failed his mission, he was ███ ███ ████ ███ ████ ████████ █████████ ████ ████████ █████ ██ ███████████ ███ ███ ████████ ██ ██ ███████████ ███ ████ Soylent™ █████ ████ ███ ████ █████ ███ ██████████ ████ █████ ████ █ ████████ ██████ ███████ ████ ███████████ ████████ ███ ███ ████ █████ ████ ████ ████ ██ ███ █████ ███████ ██ ███ █████ ████████ ███ ████ ██ ████ ████████ ██████ ████ ████████ ███ ██ ██ ███ ██ ████ █████ ███████ ███████ ██ ████ ██ ███ ████████ ████ █████ █████████ according to Kuznetsov. ███ ████ ██ █████████ ████ ████████ ██████████ ███ █████████ ██ ███ ██████ █████ ███████ ███████

████ ████ ██ █████ █████ █████ ███ ████ █████ ███ allegedly caused by ████ ████ ██████ ███████ ███████ ██ █████ ███ ████████ ████████ ██ █ ██████ ███ █ █████ ████ ████████ ██████ the ████ ███████████ █ ███ ██████ ███ ████ ████ ████ ██ ████████ ███████ ████ ███ ██████ ████ █ ████████ ████████ ████ ███████ █████ ████ ███ █████ █████ 300 boxes of CheesyNiggers™ ██████ ████████ ████ ████████ ████████████ ██ ████████ ███████████ "Cobson" ███ ████ █████████ ███████ ████ ████ ███ ████ █████ ████ ███████ ██ ████████ DO NOT APPROACH HIM, HE ████ █████ ██████ █████ ████████ ███ ████████ ████ █████████ ████████ ████████ ██ ████ HIGHLY DANGEROUS. ███████ ████ ████ █ █████████ ██████ ████████ ██ ████ ████ ███ ████ ██████████████████ ████████ ████████ █████████ █████ ███ █████████ ███████ ██████ █████ ███ ██████████ █████ ███████ ██ █████████ ███ successfully killed and replaced with operative "Doll" ████████ ██████████ ███ ██ ████████ ██ ████ █████████ ███ ████ ████████ ███ ████████ █████ ████ ████ ████████ ███████ ███ ██████ ██ ███ ██████ ██ ████████ ████ ████ ██████ ██ █████ ███████ █████ ████ ██████ ██ █████████ ████ ████ ███████ ██ though.

And CIA also created ████████, doe. And they're also collecting data from you via the memes you share on the internet. If you're a good goy, they might even send you to a trip to "Planet Dirt" where you may live in a pod aboard "USS kamikaze" and feast on delicious red and black liquens for the rest of your life.

Gallery

See also

CIA and its tactics to control chans

Notes

https://mega.nz/folder/0zdDwRAY#8QsX_8-c4kMN0CEqKrRUFA

https://patents.google.com/patent/US6813330

https://cryptome.org/2012/07/gent-forum-spies.htm

CIA
is part of a series on
SHUTTING DOWN SOYJAK.PARTY

>SHUT IT DOWN! SHUT IT DOWN!
"(You) VILL comply, und it VILL get worse!"
Entities that want to shut down Soyjak.party [-+]
Tactics used to shut down Soyjak.party [-+]
Major events [-+]