Walkable cities
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Walkable cities are darker than coal...
Urbanists are a relatively new form of "soyim" who mainly revolve around trying to push "walkable cities" as a replacement for suburban lifestyle. Their most well-known "organization" is just a a Jewtuber kown as Notjustkikes , but most of them can be found hanging around internet comment sections, larping as Europeans who are shocked at how car-centered American cities are. You WILL live in the shitty apartaments. You WILL pay rent. You WILL ride the bus with obese drug addicts. You WILL ride the bike. You will NOT have fun running people over with your car. You will NOT have a nice lawn. You will NOT have privacy.
The Notjustbikes copypasta
>Stroads are Ugly, Expensive, and Dangerous (and they're everywhere)
>Why City Design is Important (and Why I Hate Houston)
>Why Dutch Bikes are Better (and why you should want one)
>Why We Won't Raise Our Kids in Suburbia
>These Stupid Trucks are Literally Killing Us
>Why American Cities Are Broke - The Growth Ponzi Scheme
>We Have No Garbage Day in Amsterdam!
>Why Canadians Can't Bike in the Winter (but Finnish people can)
>The Houses that Can't be Built in America - The Missing Middle
>Amsterdam Just Got Awesomer
>The Dumbest Excuse for Bad Cities
>Suburbs that don't Suck - Streetcar Suburbs (Riverdale, Toronto)
>Cities Aren't Loud: Cars Are Loud
>Why Swiss Trains are the Best in Europe
>The Best Country in the World for Drivers
>How Bankrupt American Cities Stay Alive - Debt
>The Lively & Liveable Neighbourhoods that are Illegal in Most of North America
>The Wrong Way to Set Speed Limits
>America Always Gets This Wrong (when building transit)
An analysis of the urbanist mindset
The thing about walkable city enthusiasts is that the problem they bring up is entirely made up.[1] Mutt cities really are fine and having to drive 60+ minutes a day just to go to work is not an issue for people with normal attention spans. The urbanist does not understand that the reason people prefer to live in suburban homes is so they can get away from niggers. Walkable european cities like they existed 100 years ago were only possible because of a lack of niggers ruining it. Therefore the only logical praxis to urbanism is to first enact TND.
also every city is walkable just use your legs
Things to do in a walkable city
- Never leave because the train wont go anywhere that isnt a super urban city and because you have no car your gonna be fucked if you need to leave the city to see someone else
- Grow your children in a 6ft metal coffin apartment where they will have no backyard, barely any playgrounds, no privacy and not enough room for them to happily live
- Live with constant pollution and a decreased lifespan compared to people in subarbs or country places
- deal with whiney millennials every fucking day protesting at your local McDonalds and have to wait 80 hours for them to stop so you can order basic fucking food
- have your children on different sections of the bus based on there genders because of pedophiles on trains. not seeing your child on the other side of a train alone full of strangers is good parenting
- Live with paying more for everything than if you were in the country and be constantly in debt
- have rat infestations and animal infestations every day
- have your phone monitored by Klaus Schwab and 1 million spy cameras in your apartment and your kids bedroom
- live with crime infested gangsters whove been allowed into the city by redditors
- never be able to own a house and have to rent an apartment. you WILL not own the place you live in
- throw rocks at traintracks and watch the train crash GEGGGGGG
- only eat ultra-processed food.
- if you see a troon then don't be afraid to rob them. they cant call there parents to tell because there parents dosen't love them enough to care and they all hate the police and wont call them
- kill yourself or move somewhere else.
What not to do in a walkable city/what to bring
- Dont talk to the 700 black people around you. there all druggies and will either try to sell you something or rob you in the street
- With the stench of the large minorities and immigrants, pollution and fat people its recommended to wear a gas mask for protection
- Do not eat the ultraprocessed food you'll become fat
- Do not exercise. the millennials in the city will call the cops on you and kill your family
- if a black person is trying to rob you. let them. otherwise youll be arrested for being a racist bigot
- Remember to stock up on money. in cities everything is 10x more expensive
- Make sure to take the vaccine or you'll be arrested for being a chud
- if your being robbed remember that the police cant get to you as they can only ride bikes and run as cars are banned. Make sure to bring a weapon
How to leave a walkable city
If your planning on leaving a walkable city you need to know 3 things. first off the train only takes you to more walkable cities so unless you plan walking for 18 miles to finally escape to the countryside your fucked. Also make sure to You should not leave a walkable city because it is a uptopia and is the new sustainable future of the world. Its time to go back to your coffin pod home and enjoy your ultra processed bug burger
See also
| Walkable cities is part of a series on Soyience™ 
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>DRIVABLE SUBURBS NOW
- ↑ Those this means these soys are right? OH MY HECKING SCIENCE, WHAT A PLOT-TWIST!!
